Learn How to Say NO to Yourself

Have you ever taken a young child to a grocery store and heard them relentlessly ask you to buy them lots of sweet stuff? "Hey, can I have that Snickers bar?" "Hey, I want a doughnut!" It could go on and on. It's especially bad in the checkout aisle, where the stores strategically place all of the little candies and gums that are just the right size for little ones to grab and eat.

Well, today I was in the checkout aisle and saw an assortment of Mrs. Fields Cookies (yum!) all in a row. They had snickerdoodles and peanut butter cookies, but the one that caught my eye is the original chocolate chip cookie that Mrs. Fields is famous for.

The debate in my head was like the cartoon scenario with an angel perched on one shoulder and a devil on the other. Devil said: "Mmmm, that looks good, that would hit the spot right now. Angel: "Yeah, but all that sugar will make you crash." Devil: "Maybe, maybe not. But it sure looks good. Look at those gooey chocolate chips on the packaging. Could just melt in your mouth." Angel: "You don't need it."

I could have gone either way and it didn't really matter what I did in that moment. It only cost 59 cents and it wouldn't have sent me on an overeating sugar binge or anything like that. But something in me felt like it was important for me to practice saying no to myself.

There is so much instant gratification in our society. I think it's healthy to practice saying no to ourselves so we learn that we don't need to leave the store with a treat each time and that we are not entitled to something sweet just because we see something that looks good.

The obesity rate is climbing in the U.S. The last Wall Street Journal story I read said that one third of our country's adults are obese and one half are overweight. Can we do something about it? Yeah! Don't put in your mouth everything that looks good in the moment. Hold back and practice self-control and discipline. Being able to say no to your impulses to eat is the key to ending overeating and weight loss because it won't just be a one-time thing, but a pattern you develop that will effect you every day of your life.

To check out free chapters from the book Stop Overeating Today!, visit: http://www.stopovereatingtips.com

What's Your Responsibility with the Cost of Obesity?

I don’t want to play the blame game, but I do want to point out the fact that if health care is standardized in the US, our tax dollars will be going to pay the high medical cost of obesity: diabetes, high blood pressure, cancer, etc. What is your responsibility? What is mine?

We each will have an individual responsibility to get in better shape so we’re not taxing the nation. One person’s weight problem will become everyone’s weight problem, because we all will be footing the bill together with our tax dollars hard at work paying for prescription medications and diabetes machines. That gives a new spin to the phrase “you are what you eat”. We will all be what everyone else eats.

It doesn’t help to point the finger at the fast food industry and say they combine salt, fat, and sugars in a way that hooks our brains and gives us urges we can’t control. Because then we’re still overweight and blaming something outside ourselves that we “can’t control”, so we don’t have to point the finger inward and think about our personal responsibility to ourselves and everyone else.

What’s the solution then? What can we do about the millions of people that are hooked to eating when we need a boost, comfort, or just something to take us away from our troubles or boredom? We all can’t be on the Biggest Loser and besides, we’re not all interested in being publicly showcased and humiliated. Paying for surgery to get a band stapled onto our stomachs is costly and not guaranteed. Thousands of people gain the weight back within three years of having the operation because they were still hooked to food.

I don’t want to come off as a critic, because I’m not. I want to be your biggest supporter if you have an eating and weight problem. But I want to point out the problem first because most people with eating problems keep their eyes closed, eat what they please, and live in denial. Even if taxing others doesn’t worry you, what about your own life? You’ve got yourself to worry about. Eating problems won’t go away on their own and I’m sure you are suffering for it, even if you don’t like thinking about it. Are you happy with how your body looks and feels? Can you get around as easily as you’d like? Does eating leave you feeling energized or stuffed and tired? Do you deal with guilt?

I want to help you because I know what it’s like to have an eating problem. I struggled with overeating and even bulimia, gained 30 pounds, lost self-respect and self-control, and dove into despair. What saved me was learning how to retrain my thinking around food, so urges did not control me anymore. I changed my relationship with food and believe everyone else can do the same. It just takes desire, lots of grit and determination, and a simple tool.

This summer I published a book called Stop Overeating Today! with 33 self-help strategies that teach overeating sufferers how I overcame my eating problem and how they can too. The tips are go-at-your-own-pace and encourage the reader to start slowly so retention is possible. This go-to guide is thorough, covering all aspects of overeating: emotional eating, eating at restaurants, eating at home, food shopping and preparation, eating for comfort, overcoming guilt, and more. It puts power back into your hands so you no longer can say, “I have no control.”

So, you can close your eyes and wish your eating problem and weight problem would disappear, or you can empower yourself with a guilt-free guide and start making small sustainable changes. It’s up to you. If you don’t, it’s up to all of us to foot the bill.

The Secret to Stop Overeating with Self-Psychology

When I was struggling with chronic overeating and bulimia in high school and college, sometimes it felt like I would never be able to stop. I felt like there was a huge weight over me and I couldn’t break free from it. I was embarrassed about my lack of control and worried about how others would perceive me if they knew. If I were to describe how I felt, my story would go something like this: “I have this huge weakness around food and when I’m stressed, anxious, angry, or even excited, I lose control and eat way too much. I’ve tried changing and eating like a normal person, but I keep going back to overeating patterns, no matter what. I’m stuck.”

In my newly released book, Stop Overeating Today!, I discuss the power of self-image and how our thoughts about ourselves determine what kind of role that we play, either limiting or empowering us. Here’s an excerpt:

“Shakespeare said, ‘All the world's a stage, and all the men and women merely players.’ Each moment of each day we can choose which role we will play. Our habits turn us into predictable characters. We expect to act certain ways because that is how we have done things in the past. That is the label we have given ourselves, that is the role we identify with, and that is how we see ourselves. Self-image is very powerful and can lead us to blindly play a role that is not in our best interest...”

Here’s an example of someone playing a role that limits him. After Joe experiences a series of unfortunate events one morning – he stubs his toe getting out of bed, there is a traffic jam on the way to work and he is 45 minutes late, he forgot to put on clean underwear – he thinks to himself, “I am having a really bad day!” He is convinced. Now he’s out to prove it. What role is he playing? The victim of a really bad day. He is out to find more examples to prove his theory that the world is out to get him. He discovers that the hum of the air conditioner is distracting and the guy who works at the cubicle across from him is breathing too loudly. See how he is playing a role, stuck as a character, and only he has the power to change his self-image?

Now, an example that relates to overeating. Shannon has been overeating for the past eight years and is unhappy with how she looks and how she treats her body. She deals with a lot of guilt and thinks, “I am a weak person.” That night at a dinner party, after eating a filling meal, she is offered delicious gooey brownies with a raspberry frosting for dessert. Her eyes pop out of her head and her mouth starts to water. She thinks, “Well, I don’t have the willpower to refuse. Here I go again.”

How can Shannon change her self-image and empower herself? Another excerpt from my book, Stop Overeating Today!, explains: “Choose a role that empowers you…If you find it difficult to start playing a more empowering role, come up with some adjectives to describe the type of role you’d like to play.” Shannon could choose strong, powerful, and healthy as her three adjectives.

Next, she needs to imagine herself as a strong, powerful, and healthy person and think about how such a person would react in front of the tantalizing brownies. She needs to visualize specifically what she will do instead of eating the brownies with crystal clarity, as though it’s already happened. On the other side of the room, Shannon sees three friends in the middle of what seems to be an interesting conversation. She sees herself standing up, leaving the table, and heading in their way to join them. After crafting her crystal clear visualization, she makes it happen, focusing so much on fulfilling her visualization that the brownies are no longer a temptation.

Phew! Now that you have a tactic for avoiding overeating in pressure situations, do you want to take it a step further? Grab a pen and a piece of paper and write down the role you have been playing around food that keeps you stuck in a cycle of overeating. Have you been feeling victimized, powerless, or depressed? After you identify your role, take that piece of paper and rip it up and throw it away. Don’t spend any more time dwelling on it.

Next, take out a fresh piece of paper and write down a phrase defining yourself with your new adjectives. For example, Shannon’s would say, “I used to feel weak, guilty, and out of control around food, but now I realize I am strong, powerful, and healthy enough make smart decisions.” Try it. What does your phrase look like? Every time you feel the urge to overeat, pull out that piece of paper and repeat your mantra. The more you practice this, the more natural sounding it will be and the easier it will be to follow. Before you know it, you are not just playing a new role, you have become a new person with healthier habits and a new sense of self-confidence.

(For more information about Stop Overeating Today!, visit www.stopovereatingtips.com)

Drugs vs. Self-Control

There's an article in the New York Times about research comparing monkeys who ate 30% less calories than another group of monkeys. The group that took in fewer calories showed these results: longer lifespan and less diabetes, cancer, and cholesterol problems.

So that's good news, right? At least we know what we can do if we want to live longer and healthier. What percentage of your daily calories currently includes food you ate when you were already comfortably full? Do you stop to listen to your body to find out when it's full, or do you typically just eat the portions in front of you? Learning to restrain yourself could add years to your life, which is encouraging.

But here's the part about drugs vs. self-control. The article suggests that since most people can't stick to a diet of 30% less calories than they are used to, they are going to develop a drug that can create the same results as eating less.

First of all, that's sad that there's an assumption people won't do what's best for them. Not that I disagree. Most people won't stop overeating. So let's just skip self-control as even an option and go straight to more drugs as a solution? (Because it worked so well for Michael Jackson and thousands of others with drug dependencies). Secondly, is it realistic that a drug can substitute for healthy eating? Seriously, drugs can't solve everything. We don't want to become a nation of drug dependent overeaters.

Here's the article link: http://www.nytimes.com/2009/07/10/science/10aging.html?_r=1.