Are You Judging Other Women's Bodies? Part 1

Ok, so here is my confession. I am not perfect. Sometimes really judgmental thoughts come into my head. For example, ahem: The other while I was leaving Costco® I saw this really thin and beautiful Asian woman about my age. Into my head came the thought, “she is so beautiful and thin, I bet she is happier than me. She must have a pretty easy and blessed life.” Even though this thought entered my mind, I didn't believe it. Instead, I thought, "Wow, what a lie! How could you even look at someone and understand how happy they truly feel?"

While I was struggling with my eating disorder, I would have believed this thought. I would have entertained it and allowed more erroneous thoughts to come into my mind, such as: “If I were skinnier, I would be prettier and happier, too.” To replace the lie with something else in my head, I thought, “That isn’t true, skinny doesn’t equal happiness and I don’t need to believe that lie.” Thin doesn’t equal happy, it never did. Sure, it can give you a surge of pride and a sense of well-being, but you’ll never have genuine peace of mind because you’ll know you are skinny at the cost of being unhealthy and unbalanced emotionally, physically, and spiritually.

When I was anorexic and was at my lowest weight, I felt proud and happy, but it was a paranoid and shallow happiness, because I was constantly comparing my body to others. My self-worth was fragile and based on a number on the scale. I was paranoid that if my weight went up, that would mean I wasn’t worth as much anymore.

To stop believing untrue thoughts about your body and others' bodies is to stop fueling the eating disorder. If you don’t pay attention the thoughts, it’s like you don’t own them. You acknowledge they entered your mind but that you don’t have to hold onto them and make your mind a home for them. You can drop them, replace them with truthful uplifting thoughts, and then dwell on those.

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